原文:
Now at least I wasn’t afraid to go home, I wasn’t scared about “acting normal.” We were once again sharing everything, even if it was the awful knowledge that our days together were every one of them numbered.
There were things we had to discuss, things not usually broached by twenty-four-year-old couples.
“I’m counting on you to be strong, you hockey jock,” she said.
“I will, I will,” I answered wondering if the always knowing Jennifer could tell that the great hockey jock was frightened.
“I mean, for Phil,” she continued. “It’s gonna be hardest for him. You, after all, you’ll be the merry widower.”
“I won’t be merry,” I interrupted.
“You’ll be merry, goddammit. I want you to be merry. Okay?”
“Okay.”
“Okay.”


解説:
Now at least I wasn’t afraid(使い方は下記参照) to go home, I wasn’t scared about (・・・するのを恐れる)“acting normal.” We were once again sharing everything, even if it was the awful knowledge that our days together were every one of them numbered(「every one of them」が「numbered」の意味上の主語。1日1日が数が定められたものであった⇒限られた日数しかなかった).
There were things we had to discuss, things not usually broached(初めて話題に出される) by twenty-four-year-old couples.
“I’m counting on you(あなたに期待している) to be strong, you hockey jock,” she said.
“I will, I will,” I answered wondering if the always knowing Jennifer could tell that the great hockey jock was frightened.
“I mean, for Phil,” she continued. “It’s gonna(= going to) be hardest for him. You, after all, you’ll be the merry widower(「陽気な男やもめ」⇒「陽気な未亡人」という有名なオペラがあり、それをもじっているので定冠詞がついています).”
“I won’t be merry,” I interrupted.
“You’ll be merry, goddammit(ふざけて「ちくしょう」). I want you to be merry. Okay?”
“Okay.”
“Okay.”(宜しい)

(注)「afraid」
「・・・を恐れる、・・・がこわい、こわくて・・・できない、・・・するのを怖がる」の意で使う場合には次の3つの形が可能です。
「be afraid of 名詞」
「be afraid of doing」
「be afraid to do」
「I wasn’t afraid to go home」は「I wasn’t afraid of going home」でも同じです。