The Vision (3)

God himself showed me the way. The emotional and physical crises that interrupted my busy life at Daybreak compelled me – with violent force – to return home and to look for God where God can be found – in my own inner sanctuary. I am unable to say that I have arrived; I never will in this life, because the way to God reaches far beyond the boundary of death. While it is a large and very demanding journey, it is also one full of wonderful surprises, often offering us a taste of ultimate goal.
When I first saw Rembrandt’s painting, I was not as familiar with the home of God within me as I am mow. Nevertheless, my intense response to the father’s embrace of his son told me that I was desperately searching for that inner place where I too could be held as safely as the young man in the painting. At the time, I did not foresee what it would take to come to a few steps closer to that place. I am grateful as well for the new place that has been opened in me through all the inner pain. I have a new vocation now. It is the vocation to speak and write from that place back into the many places of my own and other people’s restless lives. I have to kneel before the Father, put my ear against his chest and listen, without interruption, to the heartbeat of God. Then, and only then, can I say carefully and very gently what I hear. I know now that I have to speak from eternity into time, from the lasting joy into the passing realities of our short existence in this world, from the house of love into the houses of fear, from God’s abode into the dwellings of human beings. I am well aware of the enormity of this vocation. Still, I am confident that it is the only way for me. One could call it the “prophetic” vision: looking at people and this world through the eyes of God.
Is this a realistic possibility for a human being? More important: Is it a true option for me? This is not an intellectual question. It is a question of vocation. I am called to enter into the inner sanctuary of my own being where God has chosen to dwell. The only way to that place is prayer, unceasing prayer. Many struggles and much pain can clear the way, but I am certain that only unceasing prayer let me enter it.


解説:
God himself showed me the way. The emotional and physical crises that interrupted my busy life at Daybreak compelled me – with violent force – to return home and to look for God where God can be found – in my own inner sanctuary.
「compel」は「・・・にむりやり・・・させる(force)」。「sanctuary」は「神聖な場所」。「in my own inner sanctuary」は「私自身の心の中で」の意(compelled meを修飾)。

I am unable to say that I have arrived; I never will in this life, because the way to God reaches far beyond the boundary of death.

While it is a large and very demanding journey, it is also one full of wonderful surprises, often offering us a taste of ultimate goal.
「large」はここでは「(範囲・規模が)相当な、かなりの」。「demanding」は「骨の折れる(difficult, challenging, tough)」。「ultimate」は「究極の(final)」。

When I first saw Rembrandt’s painting, I was not as familiar with the home of God within me as I am mow.

Nevertheless, my intense response to the father’s embrace of his son told me that I was desperately searching for that inner place where I too could be held as safely as the young man in the painting.
「intense」はここでは「激しい(passionate)」。「desperately」はここでは「必死になって」。

At the time, I did not foresee what it would take to come to a few steps closer to that place.
「take」はここでは「を必要とする」の意。

I am grateful as well for the new place that has been opened in me through all the inner pain.

I have a new vocation now.
「vocation」は何回も出てきましたが「召命(ある使命を果たすよう神から呼びかけられること)」。

It is the vocation to speak and write from that place back into the many places of my own and other people’s restless lives.
「restless」は「落ち着かない(uneasy)、不安な(anxious)」。

I have to kneel before the Father, put my ear against his chest and listen, without interruption, to the heartbeat of God. Then, and only then, can I say carefully and very gently what I hear.

I know now that I have to speak from eternity into time, from the lasting joy into the passing realities of our short existence in this world, from the house of love into the houses of fear, from God’s abode into the dwellings of human beings.
「eternity」は「永遠」。「time」は、ここでは「永遠」に対立する概念として捉えられているので「限りある時間」と捉えました。「abode」は「住居(home, house)」。

I am well aware of the enormity of this vocation.
「enormity」はここでは「膨大なこと(hugeness)」。

Still, I am confident that it is the only way for me. One could call it the “prophetic” vision: looking at people and this world through the eyes of God.
「prophetic」は「予言者の」の意ですが、コーテーションがついており「looking at people and this world through the eyes of God」の意で使っています。

Is this a realistic possibility for a human being? More important: Is it a true option for me?

This is not an intellectual question. It is a question of vocation.
「intellectual」はここでは「知性の、理論的な」。

I am called to enter into the inner sanctuary of my own being where God has chosen to dwell.

The only way to that place is prayer, unceasing prayer.
「unceasing」は「絶え間ない(constant)」。「prayer」は「祈り」。

Many struggles and much pain can clear the way, but I am certain that only unceasing prayer let me enter it.
法然上人は「ただひたすら念仏を唱えなさい」といいましたが、似ていますね。「南無阿弥陀仏」は「阿弥陀仏に帰依する(=服従し、すがる)」の意。